


What Difference Does It Make?

by IStayAway



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-17
Updated: 2014-08-19
Packaged: 2018-02-09 05:23:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1970577
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IStayAway/pseuds/IStayAway
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I am going to be erotic and different and tell a story about Aaron and Spencer falling for each other. </p>
<p>Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or the story lines in which they hold.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hotch's thoughts

I remember the first day Reid came to work for the BAU. He looked like a complete goon with his skinny purple tie against his scrawny pale body and shirt only a few shades lighter. He was a babe, not what you think. It means he was young. 

My first impression was, "Damn, now they are letting children into the FBI these days." However, first impressions can not and do not mean a thing to me. He proved to everyone, even Morgan, who was being an ass by giving him a whistle, that he could be a part of our team. If I had three PhD's and two masters by the time I was twenty-four, I would not have wasted my time on foolish things. I guess that is what is best about Reid. He is extremely wise.

Even though he rambles on and on continuously to the point of annoyance, I can still see something in him. I still kick myself over the times I have beaten him up. In our ten years of working together, I have seen such a change in this young man. My life changed to, but I feel ready to finally let go of what Voyett has done to my family and I. I will never forget it though. I want to move on in a new direction. I want to be with someone knew. Someone who is exciting and smart and laughable and good with talking to and young enough for me to still be taken care of if I age. I think I know who I am looking for.


	2. Reid's thoughts

I remember the first time I saw Agent Aaron Hotchner. His stern eyes greeted me when I walked in the first day. I felt a bit stupid and gawkish while he looked so uptight and professional. His hair was always well managed, but mine was unkempt beyond approval. 

Although Hotch's outward appearance looked well put together, he was being broke on the inside. His spouse was unappreciative of him. The tensions between him and Strauss were a tough time. Especially when Gideon left the team in a sound of silence. Above all of this, Voyett was the most challenging part of his life.

After all this, he needed a companion. Rossi was there, but even he is not a know it all on how to help somone. I am not either, but the day I saw Hotch silently breaking down in the parking lot changed our relationship forever. I remember his smile, like he was glad I was there for him. The look in his hazel eyes were unforgettable. Because he is this close to me, I would really like to get to know him better. He is like the father figure I never had. He is significant in my life, a true friend. My only desire in my life on this planet is to know someone better and to be more than a friend.


	3. Morals

I walked into the BAU one early October morning as usual. My coworkers greeted me like always, a real appreciation from them. I cared for the them as well. My coffee tasted the same but never bland. All was the same until I saw him again. 

Now, I had seen Dr. Reid coming in the same way every morning like I had done. However, something about how I was thinking last night made my mind drift. I had to snap out of it. I had to. Honestly, he was the one person the whole BAU would never expect me to chase after. I guess that was one of things that drew me to him. I like a good challenge.

JJ stood at the door of our meeting room. Her hair was done up nice, an appealing sight . Why could I not have been into women anymore like I used to be? I longed for companionship though. 

"Morning, Hotch," JJ said and followed in behind me. 

"Morning, what is the case today?" I asked casually. I set my briefcase down onto the hard wooden topped table and placed my coffee next to it. 

"I am going to wait on Reid to get in here," she said. 

I tried to cover up my blushing to the sound of his name, paranoid.

In he came that day, like a refreshing brush of wind. Even at thirty four, he still looked attractive and youthful. His mahogany red hair was translucent in the morning sun. I had to keep my eyes off him. I had to relax and play it off like it was normal. 

He smiled and his teeth rarely showed. It made it distinct for him. "Hey, what's everyone looking at me for?" He said, late for the meeting of course. 

I shook my head and looked up at JJ. "Go on, let's hear it," I said to help ease the tension. 

He took his seat and watched JJ give her presentation. I felt a bit damned that he did not look at me a single time during the entire thing. 

"In New Orleans," JJ begins, "We have a case were men have been brutally murdered and dumped in these sights." She changed the picture to something more gruesome than the last. 

"So, why are they contacting us?" Rossi asked. 

"The murders have all been two months apart. The dump sights are also relevant. Not to mention that the way these people have been killed have all been the same," JJ explained. 

"Alright," he said and looked around at everyone. "Agent Morgan, Agent Prentiss, and Agent Hotchner will be assigned this task. 

"Yes," said Prentiss, the always obedient rule follower. She never said no or stepped out of line, such a goody girl. 

"Alright," said Morgan and rose from his seat. 

I sighed with relief but all too soon. 

"Oh, and Dr. Reid will join them as well," Rossi said.


	4. When My Eyes Can't Leave You

I shifted myself deeper into the leather chair on the jet. I could feel my cheeks slightly burn from embarrassment. How could I have been so smart at that age but still make foolish mistakes?

I told myself not to be obvious, but I felt like people were always watching me. Paranoid? Maybe, I was. 

The reason I felt that way was the new information we received that day. 

"I have looked further into this investigation, " Garcia began. Her twin tales of pinkish red bobbled with every word. 

"What did you find?" Hotch asked. 

"It seems like everyone of those men that were killed all attended the same or some other bar in downtown New Orleans," she said. 

"What kinds of bars?" He asked. The small wrinkle in between the already creased skin had my eyes intrigued. Not only was Hotch a male, but he was older than me. Older. So many more years than me is when I felt the separation at its strongest.

"Of the gay culture and other that are similar," She said, eyes locked on Hotch with a firm hold that could kill. 

"Oh, thanks Garcia. We will investigate it more off of that lead," He said and watched the screen turn black again. 

"This will be enjoyable," Emily said and pecked some more on her tablet.

"Do you have something against them?" I asked, but I already knew it. The thing about Emily is she is all about sticking to tradition. Not much changes about old Prentiss. Not a thing will change her mind about her beliefs. She likes to believe in the straight way, or one will suffer a burning death in hell. She was rambling on about one day, more than I usually do. Hotch looked casual, so I guess my inferences are wrong. For me, I was a thousand different emotions. 

"Reid, you know that it will always be Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve," she said without looking up. Again with her sayings she read on the Internet. 

"Yeah, but have you been catching up on the recent laws passed on it, or how there have been walks, riots, and gentle protest about it?" I asked. 

She simply rolled her eyes and said, "Yes, but I still have no agreements with it."

Hotch interjected and said, "She probably doesn't read as much nonsense as you do either."

It hurt. It hurt terribly when he said that statement. I wished my ears had deceived me, but no it was all apart of a lie. Was he just trying to protect himself? God, who knew? I sure as hell was not. I felt so obvios. I stuck out, or that's how I thought I was. I had to make a quick cover up. 

"Yeah, but she is probably too busy looking at fashion or home interior stuff on there," I joked. 

He smirked. His chocolate brown eyes joined in and smiled as well.

She sighed and continued with her scrolling.

I felt the weight of my world lifted off. The only remaining weight was that of the new case. I prayed that everything would go find and nothing too bad would happen.


	5. Opinions and Acusations

Once we landed, the pace picked up again. We were escorted from the airport into a sleek black SUV. We were then greeted by Agent Tyler Moore. He was a friendly guy, but don't get me wrong when I say that he was a bit too friendly. Maybe, I was just a bit too jealous. 

After we left the parking lot, he and Reid hit it off in the front seat. However, I sat silent as a stone in the back seat next to Emily. I listened to them talk about why Virginia should be considered a Northern state, or why they called our team in. Agent Tyler's accent was almost inaudible because he it was Cajun. On the other hand, Reid's was practically mesmerizing. His Adam's apple bobbed with each deep word. His hand explained everything so well that it was almost cute.

Cute? Did I, a grown man of almost sixty something then, say that a thirty something year old was CUTE. God, I became a mess, the good kind though, from that day onward. 

Not only was it those honey brown eyes but it was also that darn smile that first intrigued me. It could not have been too long after he was shot in the neck. I was scared for him, but he pulled through. I visited him frequently during his stay at the hospital. His face sleeping looked heavenly. Oh, God, there I went again with this sweetness. "Hey, Hotch," Emily whispered in my ear. "Yeah," I asked. "Are you okay?" She inquired. I nodded my head. "Are you spacing out or staring at Reid?" Hide it you grown big old man. Don't make any sudden moves. I commanded myself. I played it off and said,"I am just joining the real world and listening to the conversation. Agent Tyler slammed on the brakes and stopped the car on the parking curb beside a hotel. "It's getting late, so y'all can jus stay in t'night." He unbuckled and got right of the car. I followed everyone else's lead and grabbed my bag and put them on the cart that he went and got for us. I walked beside Reid into the hotel. We went to our respected rooms on the third floor. Well, at least I thought we were. Emily went to a seperate hotel room. I was paired with Reid. I prayed that the bed would be seperate, but I also hope that it would be together. He punched the card into the slot. The green light flashed and he opened the door to greet us with a frigid blast. Agent Tyler wheeled on the cart behind us. "Well, whats you think?" I glanced around the room and noticed the seperate beds. I sighed, "It is nice." "Glad you like it!" He said and set our bags on the bed. Reid smiled. Stop it, would you? "Well, I'll just let you all be. Night," he said and turned to leave. "Wait," Reid said and leaned over to dig in his pocket. "Thank you." He held out a bill. "Nah, I couldn't," he said humbly. "Yes, you helped us," Reid said and placed the bill in his hand. He smiled and said, "Thanks." He finally left, thank Christ. "I am going to get a shower," I said, almost awkwardly. "Alright," he said and looked out the window. "I am going to finish my book and rest some before I do." I smiled and grabbed my bag. I hurried into the bathroom. My thoughts were becoming a jumbled mess. I had to stop this, but it was just too damn good feeling to feel so wrong.


	6. Was It Something I Said?

My mind was alive all night with my thoughts. The book I was reading to try and calm myself was not working. I peaked over the top and looked at the placid face of Hotch. When he was sleeping, it was practically angelic.

 

The words of my author suddenly became an unappealing swirl compared to him. I placed my book over on the marked page on the table. I leaned over and stood beside his bed. I gently picked up the comforter and tucked it over him.

I clicked the lamp off and the room became dark and silent. Hotch's steady breathing was all that filled the room. In my attempt to rest, I always found myself thinking of him. My heart was aching at that point. I longed for a companion's love in return. 

When I woke up the next day, I had to practically drag myself. The shower did I good job of cleaning me but a horrible job of washing away my pain and thoughts. I was suiting up my tie when I caught a glimpse of him buttoning his shirt in the mirror. I tried not to stare. 

"Come on, Reid," He said and looked around the room to make sure we did not miss turning off anything. "Let's get going."

He swiped the room key off the table and closed the door behind me. We walked down the hall side by side. God? WHY did I want to grab his hand and walk even closer? 

We met Emily and Agent Tyler in the breakfast area. 

"G'morning," He said with a slight wave in his hand.

I smiled and continued walking to fix a cup of coffee. I poured it into a portable cup for the road. As we were walking out of the hotel, the shouts of group of people were coming across the street.

"Oh no," muttered Tyler.

"What is it?" Emily leaned over and asked.

"I can tell by their posters and excessive yelling that it is an anti-homosexual group," he explained.

"Are they common around here?" Hotch asked.

Don't make any sudden movements, I told myself. 

"Yes, and have risen ever since these crimes," he said and continued walking.

"Could they be involved somehow?" I inquired. 

"If that's the lead you going from, then I suggest going up to that there ring leader and questioning him, " Tyler said and pointed at the gruff man standing on a large wooden box. 

"Who is he?" I asked.

"I dunno," he said with a shrug.

Emily, Hotch, and I all exchanged looks. We all knew we had to find out who this guy was. She was going to be the one to do it.

"Excuse me," she said and stepped towards the crowd. "Excuse me!"

Suddenly, everyone stopped chanting and fell silent. 

The leader leaped down from his podium. His expression had changed from mad,angry to upset,angry. His bushy red beard almost masked his entire face. It dropped to his wide chest when he asked, "What?"

She flipped out her badge and said, "I am Agent Emily Prentiss. These are Agents Hotchner, Reid, and Moore."

I presented my badge. 

"What's the FBI doing here?" He said with a grunt and folded his arms over his chest.

"We are here investigating a few related crimes," She said and kept a sharp eye contact.

"Great, but you don't need to pay attention to it much, sweetheart," he scoffed.

She frowned and said, "It still has families concerned."

"Nobody cares about the homos," he said defensively.

I prayed that she would save her anti- homosexual talk for later. 

"If you don't mind my asking, sir, but what is your unauthorized group doing on this busy city sidewalk?" She asked and raised a brow.

"Keeping the peace," he stated firmly.

"It seems to me like a disturbance," she said.

"Yeah, but at least we are getting the message out there that people will go to hell if they turn the wrong way of immortal homosexuality," He said.

I felt my stomach drop. Surely, I would not get a first class ticket to hell if I was homosexual. However, I am a believer in a higher power. 

His eyes shifted to me. I could feel them devouring me slowly. 

"I don't think you should be yelling it as uncivilized as this looked," Hotch said. 

"What, are you one of these homos too?" He blurted out.

Hotch shook his head and simply said, "We are through here. Let's get going."

The guy smiled a beefy smile. As we turned to leave, I couldn't help but feel an ache in my soul. Could I let this bother me? No, I had things to do. This guy, this redneck and uncouth ape and his pathetic speech were not going to change me.


	7. Riots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sorry, so so sorry for not posting often as I should.

I checked the street before crossing. The traffic had been heavily congested all afternoon. The rain was even heavier. I guess the only good thing that happened that day was strolling under an umbrella with Reid. Other than that, the day was horrible.

 

"What is the connection to this bar?" Reid asked Agent Tyler when we stopped in front of "The Lucky". The Lucky was an alley bar hidden like a hole in the wall.

 

Agent Tyler shook his umbrella. "This is the hotspot where most men are last seen," he stated.

 

Reid nodded and followed him into the bar. The new wave music hit us like a thick wind. The laughter from the tables was unaffected by the blaring music. So many men were on each other or close to getting to know each other. As we passed through,men were staring at my Reid or maybe Prentiss. I could have just been paronoid.

 

Agent Tyler stopped our troop in front of the bar and took a seat on the high stool. I take mine next to Prentiss.

 

The friendly face of the bar tender comes around the wooden counter. His concentration is on his white towel wiping down the evening. He happened to glance at us and smile. He stopped his mopping in front of Reid and said, "Evening, fellows." His eyes shifted to me and Emily. His brow furrowed at her for a few seconds but soon went back to normal. "What kind I do for you?"

 

Agent Tyler flipped out his badge. "We need your help."

 

The bartender slung the towel over his shoulder. "Are you here to talk about the crimes?" He eyed Reid particular, a tiny glint in them.

 

"Yes," He said, "This is Agent Dr. Reid, Agent Prentiss, and Agent Hotchner."

 

The bartender shakes our hands and asked Reid,"You're a Dr. Agent?"

 

Reid nodded and said, "It is a long story."

 

The bartender laughed and leaned against the bar behind him.

 

"Could you tell us anything you would know about any suspicious men?" I asked. I wanted the flirting session to stop.

 

"Well," He began, "Most of the men that come in here are not homosexual. They come in here to play around." He paused. "The few that are actually gay have came once then never came back. I figured that it is the reason we are not that popular."

 

"Did the few that didn't come back with a man when they left?" Prentiss asked.

 

"Of course. They found mates. If it didn't last, they'd come back." He looked over our heads and said. "Damn, it's too crowded to see him, but there is this guy who keeps coming back.

"Right," Prentiss deflated.

I had to come to her aide and quickly.

The bartender seemed interesting and not in a good way either. His posture was crooked and his lip continued to twitch throughout our conversation.

"Do you ever 'help out' anyone that comes in here?" I asked.

His eyes darted in my direction.

"Of course not," he said, defensively. "I just work the g* damn bar."

"All right."

"I only serve the drinks to those who ask or look lonely."

He definitely exposed his true indentity in that statment

. "If you don't mind, we would like to speak with your manager about this." I glanced at Reid, who was too studying this man's peculiar behavior

. "Our manager is out running an errand." He began to pick at his nails. "He should be coming back any moment."

The door opened and the bright light shone through the black out bar. I squinted and saw the guy who was playing Jesus earlier coming in. I anticipated another lecture from him about how this whole bar is going to hell.

"Aye, boss," said the bartender, his mouth turning into a sneer. "Hello," said the guy.

He turned to us and said, "Well, it seems as through New Orleans isn't that big of a city after all."


	8. Riots

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sorry, so so sorry for not posting often as I should.

I checked the street before crossing. The traffic had been heavily congested all afternoon. The rain was even heavier. I guess the only good thing that happened that day was strolling under an umbrella with Reid. Other than that, the day was horrible.

"What is the connection to this bar?" Reid asked Agent Tyler when we stopped in front of "The Lucky". The Lucky was an alley bar hidden like a hole in the wall. 

Agent Tyler shook his umbrella. "This is the hotspot where most men are last seen," he stated. 

Reid nodded and followed him into the bar. The new wave music hit us like a thick wind. The laughter from the tables was unaffected by the blaring music. So many men were on each other or close to getting to know each other. As we passed through,men were staring at my Reid or maybe Prentiss. I could have just been paronoid.

Agent Tyler stopped our troop in front of the bar and took a seat on the high stool. I take mine next to Prentiss.

The friendly face of the bar tender comes around the wooden counter. His concentration is on his white towel wiping down the evening. He happened to glance at us and smile. He stopped his mopping in front of Reid and said, "Evening, fellows." His eyes shifted to me and Emily. His brow furrowed at her for a few seconds but soon went back to normal. "What kind I do for you?"

Agent Tyler flipped out his badge. "We need your help."

The bartender slung the towel over his shoulder. "Are you here to talk about the crimes?" He eyed Reid particular, a tiny glint in them. 

"Yes," He said, "This is Agent Dr. Reid, Agent Prentiss, and Agent Hotchner."

The bartender shakes our hands and asked Reid,"You're a Dr. Agent?"

Reid nodded and said, "It is a long story."

The bartender laughed and leaned against the bar behind him. 

"Could you tell us anything you would know about any suspicious men?" I asked. I wanted the flirting session to stop. 

"Well," He began, "Most of the men that come in here are not homosexual. They come in here to


End file.
